The Folk Orc Repertoire #2 - Johnny Todd

Ol' Johnny 'Seven Fingers' Todd as he was known to no-one.

Furthering our exploration into the very best session songs from the back catalogue of traditional folk music which has been through a Folk Orc battering we come to our second song on the list: Johnny Todd. This song has always been popular in sessions, and unlike many that come through, it is one that you may have heard in popular culture. I say popular culture, what I mean is a TV show about the police from the 1960s starring Brian Blessed. Even so, if you are of a certain vintage you may recognise the song as being the theme tune to Z-Cars. Johnny Todd is not about the police, cars or Brian Blessed but it is a Liverpudlian song and although Z-Cars was set in a fictional town, it was based on the town of Kirkby near Liverpool, I guess that is as good of a connection as any.

Johnny Todd

Johnny Todd he took a notion,

For to cross the raging tide,

And he left his true love behind him

Weeping on the Liverpool side.

For a week she wept full sorely,

Tore her hair and wrung her hands,

Then she met with another sailor

Walking on the Liverpool sands.

“Why fair maid are you weeping,

For your Johnny gone to sea?

If you will wed with me tomorrow

I will kind and constant be.

I will buy you sheets and blankets,

I'll buy you a wedding ring,

You will have a silver cradle

For to rock your babies in.”

Johnny Todd came home from sailing,

Sailing over the ocean wide,

For to find that his fair and false one

Was another sailor's bride.

So all young men who go sailing,

For to fight the foreign foe,

Never leave your love like Johnny,

Marry her before you go.

The song starts with our Mr Todd, first name Johnny, leaving to go to sea having taken ‘a notion.’ This rather suggests that this was more of a whim than any necessity, what we are looking at here is a man with a new hobby, a fairly well off man who woke up one morning, possibly after a night out that may have involved a casual ale infused chat with another man who owns a boat or at least says he owns a boat and our Johnny has thought to himself ‘I could do that.’ So here he is, off on a voyage of discovery leaving his true love behind weeping on the docks of Liverpool. The context of why he has decided to go to sea here is quite important as you may feel a certain amount of sympathy for Johnny as this story progresses. There are many folk songs about men who have gone off to sea, but most have been press-ganged into service or go to work as they can’t make money on dry land, Mr Todd here is fairly unique in the folk song world with his decision being made entirely by him having ‘a notion’ to do so. 

His true love that was left weeping on the docks was understandably upset about her husband-to-be deciding to swan off across the seas on a whim, so much so that she was tearing her hair out and wringing her hands in a fit of grief. This lasted for a whole week, which must have been horrific for her friends and family to watch. Thankfully though, after a week she was fine and ready to start cruising the beach for a replacement Johnny. 

It didn’t take long for her to come across ‘another sailor’. Which is an interesting phrase to use and signifies that the composer of this song was certainly on team Johnny if not Mr Todd himself, because to refer to another sailor suggests that Johnny himself was a sailor and not just a rich boy with ants in his pants. One feels that Johnny returned from his voyage full gusto, claiming that he was now in fact a fully fledge sailor, despite only ever having had one trip out and possibly never venturing onto the great blue wet ever again.

Anyway, Johnnys supposedly grief stricken love has met a sailor and it would appear he has some strong prospects as a suitable match. For a start he promises to kind and constant, which is a pretty reasonable thing to expect. Then a wedding ring, again, pretty basic stuff but that obviously doesn’t quite hit the mark with our heroine, so the sailor ups his game with the offer of a silver cradle to rock her baby in, which is a pretty outlandish thing to promise. It may surprise you to learn that silver cradles are actually a thing, although generally they are the size of a small ornament, gifted to new mothers upon the birth of a child. Quite how a sailor is planning on obtaining one large enough for a baby is anyone’s guess but it worked and they got married, as Johnny finds out on his return in the next verse. 

Johnny finds himself a little bitter on his return to find that his fair and false one has hitched up with another man and so provides a warning to all men who go off sailing the seven seas. The warning is an important message that I feel many of us should hold on to, it goes like this: should you feel the need to fulfil a whim by buggering off around the world at a moments notice, then make sure you marry your girl before you leave otherwise they may decide that they have had enough of your shenanigans and look elsewhere for companionship. 

Here is a play-along version of The Folk Orc arrangement fo this song:

I may have been a little harsh on Johnny, the lyrics do mention the idea that this warning is for men who go off to fight a foreign foe, so, to be fair, it is likely that Mr Todd’s notion was not just cruising around the coast sampling the best local cuisine but in fact it was to join the British navy to go and fight whichever nation Britain was currently at odds with, probably the French. It was very commonplace for young men from rich families to buy their way into an officer position in the navy. Although I stand by the fact that his notion was little more than whim, maybe a sudden need to prove himself a man. For more information on this I highly recommend the Hornblower books by C.S. Forester or indeed the television series starring Ioan Gruffudd. Do you think I’ve been a bit unfair on our Johnny? Let me know in the comments.

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